Send them too early and guests forget; too late and the people you love most have already made other plans. The right moment for save-the-dates, invitations and the reply date depends on where you marry and who has to travel. Here is the short answer, then the detail, and a timeline you can copy straight into your planner.
The short answer
Send save-the-dates six to eight months before the wedding (up to twelve for a destination wedding), the invitations two to three months before, and ask for replies about four weeks before the day. For a destination wedding or many guests abroad, move each step earlier.
| What | When to send it | Good to know |
|---|---|---|
| Save-the-date | 6 to 8 months before | Up to 12 months for a destination wedding or a holiday weekend |
| Wedding website | With the save-the-date | So every question has one place to go |
| Invitation | 2 to 3 months before | 3 months or more if guests travel from abroad |
| Reply date (RSVP) | About 4 weeks before | 4 to 6 weeks for a large wedding |
| Gentle reminder | A few days after the reply date | Only to those who have not answered |
| Thank-you notes | Within 1 to 3 months after | Sooner is always kinder |
Save-the-dates: six to eight months ahead, twelve if guests travel
A save-the-date says only three things: your names, the date and the town. Its job is to protect the day in your guests' calendars before anything else claims it. Six to eight months ahead is enough for a wedding close to home. For a destination wedding, a bank holiday weekend or the height of summer, send them nine to twelve months before, so guests can book time off and travel while prices are kind.
Send them only to people you are certain to invite. A save-the-date is a promise: everyone who receives one must receive the invitation too.
Invitations: why the answer changes from one country to the next
If you read three guides you will find three different answers, and they are all right for their own country:
- In the United States, six to eight weeks before the wedding is the classic rule.
- In the United Kingdom, invitations usually go out eight to twelve weeks ahead, around three months.
- In France, the faire-part traditionally leaves four to six months before, often without a separate save-the-date.
Our calm middle ground: two to three months before the wedding, with a save-the-date already sent. It gives guests time to arrange travel and childcare, and it is close enough that nobody puts the invitation in a drawer and forgets it.
Destination weddings and guests who travel
When most guests have to fly, everything moves earlier. Send the save-the-date twelve months ahead, and the invitation at least three months before, with the practical details ready on your wedding website: the nearest airport, a few places to stay, how to get from one to the other. If only a handful of guests live abroad, simply send theirs a few weeks before everyone else's.
The reply date: four weeks before the day
Your caterer will want final numbers, and you will want a quiet week to draw the seating plan. Ask for replies about four weeks before the wedding, or six weeks for a large wedding with a complicated plan. Write the date clearly, as a day and a month rather than "as soon as possible". For wording that people actually answer, we collected 27 RSVP examples.
Digital invitations: the same timing, fewer lost replies
A digital invitation follows exactly the same calendar as a paper one. What changes is what happens next: it arrives the moment you send it, guests reply in a tap, and you can see at a glance who has not answered yet.
That is the idea behind our Vowery invitations, designed by Serment Couture: an interactive invitation that opens on your guests' phones, with the details, your story and a live RSVP that writes every reply into a sheet only you can read. Each one, like The Invitation · Heirloom, is a Canva template you edit in the free version of Canva, and it can sit alongside printed cards for the guests who love paper. If you want one link for everything, our guide explains whether you need a wedding website, and how to share it with a QR code.
A timeline you can copy
- 12 months before: set the date, book the venue, draft the guest list and, for a destination wedding, send the save-the-dates.
- 8 to 6 months before: send the save-the-dates and open your wedding website.
- 4 months before: finalise the guest list and the wording; order or prepare the invitations.
- 3 to 2 months before: send the invitations, with the reply date about four weeks before the wedding.
- 4 weeks before: the reply date. Send a gentle reminder to anyone who has not answered, then give final numbers to the caterer.
- 2 weeks before: share the order of the day and any last practical details with your guests.
- 1 to 3 months after: send your thank-you notes.
The invitations are one line of a longer list. Our month-by-month wedding planning checklist places them among everything else, including the moment to order your wedding dress.
Five small mistakes to avoid
- A reply date that is too close to the wedding, which leaves no time for the seating plan.
- Invitations that arrive before the website is ready, so the questions come to your phone instead.
- Leaving guests to guess who is invited. Write every name on the invitation, and say clearly if a partner or children are included.
- Forgetting the dress code, or mentioning it only on the day.
- Sending a save-the-date to someone you are not sure you will invite.
Questions
Is it too late to send wedding invitations six weeks before?
For a small wedding close to home, six weeks still works, especially if guests already received a save-the-date. Set the reply date three to four weeks before the day and send the invitations as soon as they are ready.
Can I send invitations without sending save-the-dates first?
Yes. Many couples skip the save-the-date, particularly for a small wedding. In that case, send the invitations earlier, three to four months before the wedding, so guests still have time to plan.
How far in advance should I send invitations for a destination wedding?
Send the save-the-date twelve months ahead and the invitation at least three months before, with travel and accommodation details ready on your wedding website.
When should the RSVP date be?
About four weeks before the wedding, or up to six weeks for a large wedding. That leaves time to chase the last replies, confirm numbers with the caterer and draw the seating plan.
Are digital wedding invitations acceptable?
Yes, and more and more couples send them. They follow the same timing as paper invitations, arrive instantly and collect replies in one place. If some guests prefer paper, send them a printed card and everyone else the digital invitation.
When should thank-you notes be sent after the wedding?
Within one to three months of the wedding. A short, personal note, sent soon, means more than a long one that arrives much later.
